*The Chubby Cheeked Monster decided to hit "Publish". Isn't he helpful? No? Well, adorable then!*

I think that I must not be a very faithful person. In the Bible, people endured l-o-n-g trials. The Isrealites in these desert, Job's redemption, Paul's long imprisonments that eventually led to his death.

Mine? Short. It doesn't so much feel like grace as it does "well, she can't handle much, so We won't push her too far". Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful, but it leaves me longing for a maturity that I'm not gaining, and the reason is clear. I'm not spending my time in the Word. Not dialed in at church and small group (small group is a whole separate post), never take 20 minutes to just hang out with God and let Him talk to me about whatever is on His mind.

A friend of mine who is a missionary in a Muslim country starts his days off by asking, "God, what are you doing today? Can I tag along?". That is wisdom. I absolutely need to start doing that. Today I started by putting one of my Bibles beside my bed to read while the kids sleep in the morning. I've purposed to start every day reading Proverbs.

Anyhow, the Music Man came home with roses yesterday, and it totally broke the angry spirit I was living in. By the grace of God, I asked him to sit with me on the sofa and talk. A good long conversation led to some constructive ideas on how we can work out the problem and then immediately putting one of them into practice. It was kairos, sacred time. We're still light years away from where we need to be, and getting it right once doesn't even come close to addressing the problem, but he took the initiative to make things better yesterday, and that meant a lot to me.

In the book Love and Respect (which I highly recommend), Emerson Eggerich talks about how women primarily need love, and men primarily need respect. Her respect fosters his love, which provokes her respect, and round and round we go. It really does work.

So Music Man and I got at least a little resolution, and I got my tomatoes and peppers into the ground. I'll call it a successful day.

Be still and know that I AM

They say to write what you know. Today what I know is painful, and I don't so much want to talk about it. When I don't want to talk, those of you who know me know that I probably NEED to talk. Sigh.

The Music Man and I have one real fight, and we've had it for several years. I tend to think that I'm right, (and Biblically I am, make no mistake) and he may or may not care, I'm not really sure. He says he cares, but when the situation is painful to me and he never makes any attempt to change it, well, I'm not buying what he's selling. Even though I'm right, I know that doesn't really touch the heart of the matter. If the heart of it is loving and honoring, I'm w-a-y outside of that dynamic.

But this is pernicious pain, insidious, leaking out of me. It's pain that makes me want to rely on things that are outside of God and "lean into my own understanding". Proverbs says that fools despise wisdom, that is, the right and wrong God explicitly gives us through the logos word, but what I'm dealing with right now is the rhema word, the whisper of the Holy Spirit to my ragged and wounded heart.

I just want to run it out, to hit the pavement so hard that I exhaust it out of my bones. I think it's now inscribed on my marrow, replicating into every cell of my body. It's one of those hurts that even the extensive work of forgiveness and reconciliation hasn't yet stamped out. I don't know if that's because I haven't worked hard enough, or if I haven't released it fully, or if it just hasn't been enough time. I always want something done with NOW, so two and a half years seems like an insufferable amount of time. I'm so restless, can't just sit still and be with the feelings, with the Lord.

I'm not sure to it'll get fixed right now, so I'm just trusting Romans 8:28.

Daybook for April 28th

FOR TODAY

Outside my Window...a sea of emerald, everything covered in and refreshed by the rain

I am thinking...about what an immense joy my children are, how sweet it is to watch them sleep

I am thankful for...getting through these days, however painful they may be

From the kitchen...as usual, green smoothie awaits

I am creating...nothing these days, just surviving

I am going...to find a way out of this mess

I am wearing...mom clothes, 'nuff said

I am reading...Tales of the Kingdom

I am hoping...to get out by myself for a bit of fresh air today, maybe planting my tomatoes

I am hearing...my daughter ask if she can watch TV at 7:30 AM (uhm, no)!

Around the house...the landscape is a bit dangerous. There will be much cleaning today.

One of my favorite things...is knowing His grace is sufficient for me, even when it feels like everything is coming apart at the seams

A Few Plans For The Rest Of The Week...getting my peppers and tomatoes in the ground, making more sprouted grain bread, shopping today, group Thursday, hopefully catching up on a little sleep.

Here is a picture thought I am sharing for you...

You know you want to go see Peggy, so do it. :)

The PedEgg

Has anyone used this thing? If not, get thee to Walgreens or Target and spend the $10. It's seriously the best $10 I ever spent. OK, maybe not THE best $10, but I can't presently think of anything better.

One of the quirks about me is that I'm 5'2" and have size 9.5 feet. Freakish, no? Add to that years of callouses from playing sports that laugh at pumice and those sandpaper things, and you'll get a picture of these plates of meat (a little Cockney for you).

I'd seen the crazy PedEgg commercials, and I was skeptical. I mean, who buys "As seen on TV" stuff? Yeah, I was desperate. I purchase said "egg", schlep it home, and bust it out of it's industrial strength package. As ElleBee pointed out, it looks as though it would feel like a box grater on your feet, and yeah, it kind of does. Slough lightly.

I set out and spend probably a good hour *ahem* shaving my feet. My three year old is the one who called it shaving, but it's fairly accurate. Emptying the collection bin is the only relatively gross part, but you'd be shocked at how much skin you can shave off and how easy it is to make your husband empty it by saying "Hey honey, look how GROSS this is".

Pros: Does a great job getting the ickies off of your feet. Cheap. Pretty good hand feel.

Cons: Can take off more than you want to, causing a little pain if you're not careful. Difficult to find in some areas.

Overall: Fan-freaking-tastic!

Friday Talk: Makeup Mistakes--Blush

Blush is the red-headed stepchild of the makeup world. Everyone seems to either W-A-Y overemphasize it or ignore it altogether. How would that make you feel if you were blush? I'm going with bipolar. One day you're a make your wearer look like a zebra, a stark stripe angled severely down both cheeks, the next day you're not even a glint in a non-wearer's eye.

I started out not wearing makeup at all really, except the occasional foundation when I looked super blah. One day, the cosmetic manager asked me if I wanted some samples of blush. Having a natural flush to my cheeks, I said no. She said that everyone needs a little blush, so I said, "What color is it?". Another manager (we all shared an office) said, "Who cares, anything will work", and the two of them laughed. Presumably at my ignorance. While I was all of 21, I refused to believe that ANY blush would work on ANY woman.

Not wanting to seem ungrateful, I took what was offered. I still have this blush, as a reminder. It was a deep, deep rose cream blush that had been part of a Clinique GWP (gift with purchase). If you're new to blush, cream is a hard place to start, especially when said cream is old and not as creamy as cakey. Anyhow, I digress.

Here are some suggestions for blush. First, you should generally use two colors. I know, I know. What a pain. But it makes a huge difference. Really. Most people in the fair to medium category should go with an apricot shade and a SUPER DUPER BRIGHT PINK that goes on really sheer.

Apricot and pink shares are typically chosen because they look youthful. Generally the best idea is to do the apricot shade all over your cheek, in a C-curve up to your temple. Why? Because when you blush naturally, the flush creeps up to your temples. We're just trying to enhance the just-went-for-a-run-then-got-an-amazing-kiss-before-having-a-
small-glass-of-wine look.

For apricots, I mean anything in that range. I'm currently using Elizabeth's Arden's blush in Apricot (complicated, eh?) which has been discontinued, but I also love Lancome's Miel Glace for people who are quite fair, and Sheer Peach Organza for fair to medium tones. And if there's one blush that's as amazing as its name, it's Nars Orgasm, a cult favorite.

For the pinks, I'm talking shades that are flamingo-esque, kabuki-theater like, 80's neon t-shirt. All of the above. Since you're supposed to write what you know, I'll suggest Lancome's Shimmer Pink Pool. Nars Angelika is great, too. It's sort of hard to believe, but these uber-brights are really wearable, sheer shades in disguise. Don't be afraid, blush has come a long was since the aforementioned 80's. These you wear just on the apples of your cheeks, and blend into the c-curve a bit. Don't make yourself look like a clown by adding just one thwap of blush on your apple without blending. And if you do, don't say you learned to use blush from me.

For my darker toned ladies, I love love love Lancome's Shimmer Coral Sunset on your apples. It really reminds me of the islands, it reeks of calypso music, sarongs, the sea. It's just that beautiful. As for the base color, I really like yet ANOTHER Lancome color (they make really good blush), and that's Shimmer Mocha Havana. The rules are slightly different for you, since only the darkest of ladies tend to have red undertones. I can address you all privately, that can get complex (just shoot me an email if you have questions, that goes for everyone).

I'll go into cream and gel blushes and cheek stains later on, those are typically for the more advanced user.

In summary, use two colors. Apricot-ish shades on the whole c-curve, and pink just on the apples. Oh, and then apply last week's lesson, bronzer, over the top before you skip merrily out the door.

Go see Fussypants, or die trying. We all need that much laughter in our lives!

April 21st

FOR TODAY


Outside my Window...a gorgeous day, it's supposed to b e 77


I am thinking...about whether or not to work UK today


I am thankful for...God's faithfulness in keeping me at home, with a job.


From the kitchen...my new Blendtec and how it makes great Smoothie and ice cream


I am creating...a me that I like a lot better


I am going...to try and power through a run today, though I *may* be injured.


I am reading...The Red Tent by Anita Diamant


I am hoping...that my precious friend Kate is ok


I am hearing...the chubby cheeked monster in his crib, singing


Around the house...things need some help. Today I sweep floors and clean bathrooms.


One of my favorite things...snuggling in bed with my kids in the morning


A Few Plans For The Rest Of The Week...a run today, reading Tales of the Kingdom (children's book), group on Thursday


Here is a picture thought I am sharing for you...I was going through some old photobucket pictures, and people ask about my rings, so here they are. Not a great picture, sorry. :)



Head on over to Peggy's blog at The Simple Woman to read more daybooks!

It Has Arrived!

My BlendTec is here. I made a green smoothie and tossed in 1/4 of a lemon, peel and seeds and all. Makes for a very bright tasting smoothie, that's for sure!

Later I'm making ice cream, and then sorbet. Or maybe sorbet first. Who knows. I'm totally jazzed. Oh, and there's a recipe for wheat milk in there, too. I bet the kids would love that! :)

Friday Talk: Makeup Mistakes-Bronzer

Bronzer, bronzer, bronzer. Who uses it? Why?

OK, first of all I'm of the opinion that everyone should use bronzer, and in every season. In the summer, it enhances any color you get from the sun and gives you a little sparkle. In the winter, it livens up blah skin and makes you look and feel healthier. If you have issues with your face looking lighter than your neck and are sure you're wearing the right foundation color, bronzer can bring your coloring more in line. If you're fair year-round like I am, it'll help you look less washed out. If you're already tanned, the light reflectors disperse light evenly making you look even-toned and radiant.

So here's the HOW. I know people are afraid of the stuff. It's ok, really. I"m here to help. :)

First, I'll recommend a mixed fiber brush like this one. It'll help even if you're a little heavy-handed.

Second, you'll need to find a good color. Most bronzers are pretty good these days, just try to stay away from any that are a single tone. Even drugstore brands are pretty good, and I'm personally using Physician's Formula Solar Powder Light Bronzer right now.

Finally, the process: Start by swirling your brush so that you get some of each color on the palette. Start with the areas of the face that would be naturally sunkissed first. That is usually the bridge of the nose, the forehead, and the chin. Then you can use a little on the rest of the face, just using what's left on the brush.

If you go a touch overboard, you can go over your face with a little of your regular powder to take the punch out of the bronzer, but generally a light hand and a good brush make this process pretty easy.

And for the love of Pete, please don't use a bronzer instead of a blush. They're generally too reddish-brown to make a natural flush (unless you're quite dark complected), and that's what we're going for anyhow.

My Other Two Darlings

The Look Alike has gotten lots of press lately because she is so new. I thought I'd show you the Firecracker Princess and the Chubby Cheeked Monster. Aren't they adorable?


The monster is holding his sister's dress up butterfly wings. He wore them off and on for most of the day.



The Firecracker Princess was all dressed up (as I'm sure you can see). She was ridiculously happy to have her picture taken, but is in that weird stage where she won't smile the "right" way.

I'm happy to report that, at this moment, she's sitting on the sofa nursing her baby doll. She said, "Mommy, my baby wants to nurse on my other breast today". Wow. At least I know she knows that's how babies should be fed!

Yes, That Is Green Smoothie

Benjamin Franklin once said, "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy". No disrespect intended, but that's what I think about green smoothie. Or Smoothie, as she is known around our house. She's part of the family, after all.

Today I went to three thrift stores looking for a replacement blender to tide me over until the new one comes. Nada. I was feeling rather dejected because I couldn't imagine waiting until Saturday to have my beloved Smoothie. I pulled into the garage defeated, when I saw it. Angels sang. There was a Christmas-like shaft of light that seemed to come from heaven itself and landed on the cheap plastic blender that we got when we were first married.

It had no blade, but my husband never throws anything away. He's a real packrat. I came in, trying not to get my hopes up and casually asked where the blade was for that blender, not knowing whether it would work. He found the blade in about 2 minutes, and we got the thing going. A little rickety, but it turned. The greens were a little chunkier than usual,
but it was green Smoothie.

I still can't wait to get my BlendTec, but this will serve until Saturday. Now I'm going to make another, just because I can.

The Simple Woman's Daybook

FOR TODAY


Outside my Window...an amazingly overgrown yard, and a sun that's not so warm as it looks


I am thinking...about my run today


I am thankful for...my children's every breath


From the kitchen...bowls heaped with bran flakes since our BlendTec is on its way


I am creating...warriors in the army of God


I am going...slowly insane waiting for said blender


I am reading...Catcher in the Rye, since I never read it in school


I am hoping...for a peace that surpasses all understanding while I wait to find out about my job


I am hearing...the baby's swing and her slightly congested breathing


Around the house...things are a mess, but I'm working on it.


One of my favorite things...roasted asparagus, with a little lemon juice


A Few Plans For The Rest Of The Week... a run today, and one tomorrow


Here is a picture thought I am sharing for you... the Look Alike at six weeks.





I got this from Peggy at The Simple Woman, and it's a Monday thing, so I'll start officially participating next week.

Desperate times...

This is what desperation looks like. I decided to give the smoothie a try in the food processor. The greens, well, they were slightly chunky, but something I could deal with. See that orange chunk on the right? Yeah. That's a piece of cantaloupe. Which caused the whole thing to explode all over the place. I was wearing a green t-shirt thankfully, because it's now all over said shirt. And my kitchen. Sigh.


I really want my smoothie.

Day 2: No smoothie

I need my smoothie. Need. I am a crab without it, and even my run yesterday was flat out miserable. As I ate my ho-hum bran flakes today I dremt of cool, refreshing smoothieness.

I cannot wait for my BlendTec to get here. While we're both waiting for me to be less crabby, here are some videos of the amazing new blender coming my way. It crushes an iPod. It creams a whole chicken. It turns ice into snow.

I fear I may be going insane.

All kinds of wrong

Ya know, I really try not to complain about my life. I know that I have a great one. But today I'd just dejected. As I mentioned last week, the Job Which Must Not Be Named is in trasition, and they STILL won't tell us what's up. Apparently, according to hearsay, there hasn't even BEEN a change yet. Riiight. I'm not as dumb as I appear. :) If we're allowed to go back to our old positions (and I imagine we will be, you want to retain your best people in most businesses), then it'll mean a 50% pay cut, which I'm not sure I'll do. Needless to say, my heart isn't in my job, I'm just sticking it out until we hear something definitive.

And, my blender broke today. I mean the whole shaft thing that turns the blades snapped off as I was trying to get my morning fix, er, meal. I decided a while ago that I'd buy a Blendtec when this one died, but I didn't think it would
be so soon, and I certainly didn't think it would be at a time when I don't really have a job. Sigh.
The icing on the crappy day cake is that the thing takes at least a week to get here. You'd think that if you spent $400 on a blender, they could get it to you pronto. No green smoothie for me,
I guess I'll invest in a fiber supplement like NOW.

It's 50 degrees and rainy, and I increase my mileage today for my run. Yikes.

OK, done whining.

Mish Mash

Before today's post, I just have to get this off of my chest. It annoys me when people on cooking shows take a bite of the food they just prepared and look as though they're having a foodgasm. Annoying. I mean, YOU made the food, doesn't it stand to reason that you'd like it? Duh.

And a second rant, I can't stand Giada De Laurentis. In this Food Network commercial, her two favorite foods are two of her recipes. That smacks of pompousness.

Back to your regularly scheduled programming: I finished my run for today, and it was lovely. Well, ok, maybe not lovely, but it was better than yesterday, except I went slightly further up yet another hill. I was determined that I wasn't going to walk up the hill that's at the very end of my run (hereafter known as Heinous Hill), and I didn't. I kept telling myself, "You're a runner darn it, a hill is not going to beat you"! It's about 1/3 of a mile, 90 feet up. If you wonder how I know that, check out mapmyrun.com, and add the elevation (bottom left). Very cool.

It's only slightly ironic that I thought that, since when I was in labor with the Look Alike, I kept telling myself, "A contraction is not going to beat me". I'll be honest though, About half way up I kept repeating "Jesus, Jesus". Not in a blaspheming way, of course. In a "holy crap, I'm not sure I'll make this" thing. I'd LOVE to know what the people who live on Heinous Hill thought.

So I have survived day two. Tomorrow I don't run, that's for Saturday. Which is good, because tomorrow is my 6-week port-partum visit. Bring on the scale, people!

Work stress equals...

The Job Which Must Not Be Named is in transition, it seems, and it's ugly. I'm fairly freaking out about not having that income as of, well, like tomorrow. Just to put it in perspective, that's 40% of our monthly income. Don't get me wrong, we'll be ok, but it's a huge blow.

So what do I do about it? Well, yesterday I decided to train for a half marathon. Did you know they do one at Disney World in January? They do!! I found a 26 week training schedule that seems totally doable, so I'm going to start planning to do the half and if I think I can push myself further, do a full marathon.

I'm so not a runner, but I need to get into shape and I don't work out without a goal, so it seems like a good solution. Plus, I plan to run for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. Since baby Ethan died of leukemia, it just seems right.

So if you're interested, here's the schedule I plan to follow (except I'm going to job instead of walk this week, I know I can walk 20 min without a problem):

1	Walk 20 min.	Rest	Walk 20 min.	Walk 20 min.	Rest	Walk 20 min.	Rest	80 min.
2	Run/Walk 20 min.	Rest	Run/Walk 20 min.	Run/Walk 20 min.	Rest	Run/Walk 20 min.	Rest	80 min.
3	Run/Walk 25 min.	Rest	Run/Walk 25 min.	Run/Walk 25 min.	Rest	Run/Walk 25 min.	Rest	100 min.
4	Run/Walk 30 min.	Rest	Run/Walk 30 min.	Run/Walk 30 min.	Rest	Run/Walk 30 min.	Rest	120 min.
5	Run/Walk 35 min.	Rest	Run/Walk 35 min.	Run/Walk 35 min.	Rest	Run/Walk 35 min.	Rest	140 min.
6	Run/Walk 35 min.	Rest	Run/Walk 35 min.	Run/Walk 35 min.	Rest	Run/Walk 35 min.	Rest	140 min.
7	Run 20 min.	Rest	Run 20 min.	Run 20 min.	Rest	Run 20 min.	Rest	80 min.
8	Run 25 min.	Rest	Run 25 min.	Run 25 min.	Rest	Run 25 min.	Rest	100 min.
9	Run 25 min.	Rest	Run 30 min.	Run 25 min.	Rest	Run 40 min.	Rest	120 min.
10	Run 25 min.	Rest	Run 20 min.	Run 25 min.	Rest	Run 30 min.	Rest	100 min.
11	3	Rest	4	3	Rest	5	Rest	15
12	3	Rest	4	3	Rest	6	Rest	16
13	3	Rest	4	3	Rest	7	Rest	17
14	3	Rest	5	3	Rest	8	Rest	19
15	3	Rest	5	3	Rest	10	Rest	21
16	4	Rest	5	4	Rest	11	Rest	24
17	4	Rest	6	4	Rest	12	Rest	26
18	4	Rest	6	4	Rest	14	Rest	28
19	4	Rest	7	4	Rest	16	Rest	31
20	5	Rest	8	5	Rest	16	Rest	34
21	5	Rest	8	5	Rest	17	Rest	35
22	5	Rest	8	5	Rest	18	Rest	36
23	5	Rest	8	5	Rest	20	Rest	38
24	5	Rest	8	5	Rest	9	Rest	27
25	3	Rest	5	3	Rest	8	Rest	19
26	3	Rest	3	Walk 2	Rest	26.2	Rest	34.2

So please pray for me (seriously, this seems like a huge undertaking for me)!

Part II

You know, God's faithfulness never ceases to amaze me. I spent the entire day yesterday thinking about, complaining about, obsessing about my weight. And then last night, in the few hours of sleep that I'm getting these days (courtesy of the Look Alike's schedule and my inability to sleep if there are birds chirping outside, even at 5 freaking 30), I had a dream. No idea what the rest of the dream was about, but I remember putting my hand on my hip and feeling the curve of my waist. It was littler. Not little, but smaller. I had this breezy feeling that I'd lost another 20 lbs of so (which would get me down to my pre-pregnancy weight with the Firecracker Princess), and I know it was a promise from Him that even when I am faithless, He is faithful.

About a year ago I took an inner healing class that taught writing what we hear God say to us, and one of the things I wrote down was "I chose the slope of your nose, the curve of your hip, the arch of your foot". And yes, the hairs on my head.

I'm sure I'll continue to worry about this weight issue, but maybe not in such a hopeless sense any longer. Two pounds in two weeks is still a loss, and aren't we warned "not to despise the day of small things"?

A Weighty Frustration

*Disclaimer: This is my blog and I therefore talk about whatever I want to talk about. However, weight is a sensitive topic, so those who are triggered by such talk should please avoid today's post. Thanks!

That said, here's the deal. I'm frustrated. Seriously, stinkingly frustrated. The Look Alike is 5 weeks old, and I've lost a little over 30 lbs according to my in-law's scale. Hopefully the scale at my midwife's office will be a little more forgiving on Friday. Anyhow, it's no great secret that I've got quite a bit of weight to lose. QUITE a bit. Like 25-30% of my current weight to get into my recommended weight range.

I HATE being this big. It's frustrating and painful, and no one will tell you you're overweight when you weigh what I weigh because I'm not visibly obese, though I'm technically obese according to my BMI. Suffice it to say that people who are 5'2" should never be over 200 lbs, no matter the circumstance (the circumstance being pregnancy in this situation).

I'm kind of at an impasse. I worry some that I worry about weight, having been eating disordered, off and on, for about eight years. Perhaps being overly concerned with going back there keeps the weight on. Perhaps it's something else entirely. I like to think it's because I love food, but doesn't everybody love food?

Maturity, I think that's it. I have yet to develop a maturity about the situation, and that's compounded by the fact that I grew up having to hide food and getting told I was eating too much. Wait, then I was eating too little. Sigh. I have no idea what it the "right" thing anymore.
So I've been studying some about how God would have us eat, just from the Scriptures, not anyone's book about the topic. And I do think I'm on the right track. But if I can't lose weight doing this, I wonder if I'll keep it up.

Sigh.

Ethan Powell

Many of you know that I've been praying for Ethan Powell for about a year now. It was the Firecracker Princess' most fervent prayer, truth be told. Every nap and night for prayers she'd say, "Dear Lord, please heal baby Ethan's little body, take the leukemia away from his little body".

Yesterday morning he passed away, and I am heartbroken. Heartbroken. When she got up from nap, I decided I needed to tell her. I said that baby Ethan went to live with Jesus, and her reaction made me weep. She was so excited, and said, "He's home now!".

Yes baby, yes.

Friday Talk: Makeup Mistakes-Brown Eye Shadow

Oh yes people, I'm going there. I know, I know. Most of you love your brown eye shadow, believe me I know. It was the bane of my freaking existence when I worked at the counter. Women would come in, dark hair, brown eyes, medium complexion and tell me they wear "browns" when they sat in my chair. I converted most of them, I'm happy to say, to SOMETHING else.

Now, if you're among the 8% of the world's population that has blue eyes, I want you to wear your brown eye shadow proudly (but please change it up sometimes, too). If you're from Iceland, stop reading now. Something like 90% of you have blue eyes, and you clearly can wear every shade of brown your little Scandanavian hearts desire.

OK, down to business. If I'm taking away your brown, I should at least give you another option or two. My favorites are:

Brown eyes: purples if you prefer contrasting colors, golds if you want complimentary, and blues if you're really bold. Oh yes, I said blue.

Hazel eyes: Mauves are great on you. You can totally wear the purples, too. If you like teal, it'll bring out the gold tones.

Thanks, Lindy, for telling me I forgot the green-eyed beauties out there. Forgive me!
Green eyes: green eyes look amazing with soft violets, and peach is an unexpected but gorgeous shade for you. They're hard to find, but Elizabeth Arden makes a great one, I think it's called Fizz.

If you're REALLY interested in knowing what'll look great on you, go to a craft supply store and get an artist's color wheel. See what's opposite your eye color, then experiment away. I actually own red and yellow shadows; you'd be amazed at what they can do! Let me know what you try!

Loaves and fishes

I've decided to try some new recipes this week. I bit the bullet and included some tilapia in our monthly shopping because, even though I don't LIKE fish, I know we should be eating it. Sigh.

The adventure began with a crispy fish taco recipe that sounded at least edible. I figured I'd give it a try and pray it wouldn't kill me. Since I'm here telling the tale, obviously it didn't! Actually, it wasn't half bad. Music Man thought it was quite tasty and asked me to make them again.

Crispy Fish Tacos
Ingredients

- Peanut oil (or whatever oil you use), enough for frying
- 2 cups Panko bread crumbs (in the Asian section of your supermarket)
- 2 eggs, beaten with 2 T water
- Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
- 2 pounds of your favorite white fish (cut into strips if they're thick)
- 8 corn tortillas
- 1/2 head cabbage, sliced thinly
- Lime wedges for garnish
- Fresh cilantro leaves, snipped off the stems
- Chili Mayo (recipe to follow)

Directions

1. Heat oil in a heavy-bottomed skillet over medium-high heat.
2. Put eggs in one shallow dish and bread crumbs in another. Season egg with salt and pepper. Dip fish fillets in egg, then coat them well with bread crumbs.
3. Working in batches, cook fish in oil until browned on one side, then flip and cook until completely brown. Remove to a towel-lined plate and lightly sprinkle tops with Kosher salt.
4. To serve, warm tortillas. Place one fish fillet on tortilla and add some of the cabbage and a few dollops of chili mayo. Sprinkle top with cilantro and then squeeze lime juice over the whole lot.

Chili Mayo

Mix together 1/2 cup mayo, 1/2 cup sour cream, 2 tablespoons lime juice and 1/2 teaspoon chili powder. Mix well, then sample. Add more chili powder and or lime juice to suit your tastes.

I also made Ezekiel bread. Monday I escaped the confines of my messy house to get to the Breadbeckers for the spelt and millet I needed to make it. I keep wheat and rye, but apparently one needs ancient grains to make this stuff. Thankfully I already had the kidney beans, lentils, and great northern beans to round it out. I'm telling you, this recipe is serious!

After being properly warned that it is somewhat more like a quick bread dough, even though it has a full tablespoon of yeast, I set out. My grain mill responded beautifully to the interlopers, so I was pleased with the flour. Mixed it up, tossed it in the pans, let it rise. Hmm, didn't rise so much. Oh well, figured I'd bake it up anyhow.

After a late-night sampling with apricot preserves, the verdicts: I say it's just OK. Music Man says it's like a symphony in his mouth, and that the texture is outstanding. Um, ok. Heck, at least he's happy.

I also made blueberry millet muffins. I don't know if it's because I got an aluminum-free baking powder (Rumford, you should try it) or because I'd just never made this recipe before, but they seemed salty to me. Oh, and a word to the wise. Do not, I repeat do NOT give your toddler these muffins before they get diarrhea, because the resulting diaper changes are so not fun. So not fun.


And since we already talked about Ezekiel, the name of God that I read about today was Jehovah Shammah, "the Lord is there" (Ez 48:35).