Pride

God is restoring me to my proper place within the home. And it's so strange, really, I didn't expect it to be like this.

I have worked continuously since I was sixteen years old, save the eight weeks after the Firecracker Princess was born. I have worked from home since then, and have apparently had some sort of pride about being a "work from home" mom who made her own schedule and still mothered her children. Well.

So God, in His wisdom, decided to remove that pride from me. As of January 1, I no longer worked for The Company Which Must Not Be Named. I saw it coming, and couldn't have been more thrilled, really. I so hated that job, but I felt tied to the paycheck. The Music Man assured me over and over that we were fine without it, but I wouldn't relent. I looked for jobs, I applied for position after position, hearing literally no response. So not like me, since I have a solid work history and good references. Heck, last night at the Disney Store the store manager offered me a job if I wanted one.

Anyhow, so I thought I'd totally languish without a job. God spoke very gently and told me that I felt like I needed to have a job because I didn't trust Him or the Music Man to provide. Ouch.

But you know what I've noticed? There's a LOT to do with three little kids! I thought my house was messy because I'm just lazy and don't care, but since I don't have a job, my house is noticibly cleaner. I make those recipes that have to sit and soak and stew all day. Best of all, I mother my children instead of babysitting them. It's so wonderful, this not having a job. It still stresses me out, but I really, really love being with them, truly WITH them.

Now back to my cleaning... :D